Uncharted Thoughts.

While at University today, doing a usual late night study session for a public affairs exam next week. One of my class mates asked about my apprenticeship. Asked about how it works, what I did, why it’s a failed system. To be honest, I kinda just blurted out my frustration with the system. It was very much a one sided conversation.

It wasn’t long before I got to the nitty gritty of the story. Something I haven’t really lamented on, since, well, since I can remember. When I left school. my dream was to go into the Royal Marines. To serve my country and to make some money while travelling the world. I think the real reason for this was because I realised, although I wasn’t truthful to myself yet, that I was going to end up flipping burgers, just as my teachers promised me.

So, I trained and trained and trained. Mostly in boxing, but I ran long distances as well. I was fit, like, 60 press ups a minute kind of fit. 6-8 mile run kinda fit.

Anyhow, when I told my dad I was going in the marines he said, ‘okay, but get a apprenticeship first. So when you come out, you got something to fall back on’. I argued over this for sometime. I didn’t want to waist a year of my life, when I could just join now. So, reluctantly I started my course. Level 1 in bricklaying.

I hated it. So much so, I decided to get an apprenticeship instead, because at least I could earn money while doing it. So, I did that. For three years.

Now, this makes no sense looking back at it now. But at the time, I thought, well if I’m doing a year, I might as well do three and actually get paid. So, I did three years of manual labour, for £400 a month. that’s £20 a day.

Now, I think if I actually learnt something from this, I would only be half as angry as I am now. But the truth of it is, I learnt nothing. I did three years in a trade and picked up the trowel 0 times. Zero.

Let me walk you through this, so the government pays my boss £400 pounds to pay me, to teach me how to lay bricks. Now it costs a business £100 a day for a labourer. Why pay a labourer when you can just use a apprentice, who the government is paying for. So I was a labourer. For four days a week, I’ll go on site xx and carry blocks, muck and tools for £20 a day, that’s £2.50 an hour. One of those days a week, I’d go into college and actually learn how to bricklay.

So while all my course mates (other misfits) where learning how to bricklay on site 32 hours a week + the 8 hours at college. I was learning at one fifth the speed.

Lets get to the more nitty gritty. I had two bosses over the three year period. My first was a bald bully cunt… yeah, I said it. The second was a greedy waist of space with short man syndrome.

So I lasted 5 months with the first. He physically and mentally abused me and most his younger staff. He used to burn the tips of my fingers on purpose while we laid down tarp on the foundations. He’d purposely brush over the tips of my fingers with a blow torch, and he’d purposely not buy any safety gear so I’d feel it all. But when I eventually got my own, I realised that he’d hover the torch over my hands that little bit longer so it’d turn the gloves into an oven.

He’s throw my phone in the big and my lunch. He’s shout and scream at me if I got the inside of his car muddy. Bare in mind I worked on a building site. A fucking building site in November – March in the South West of England where it always rains. Once he trapped me in a steel cage that was used to house all the gas and locked it. Left me there for five hours in negative temperatures.

My second boss wasn’t a bully. He was just a prick. He’d hold my pay on days we were rained off. As if he was paying me? He used me as a mule to lug heavy loads. He was a shit shit boss who expected me to just work till I dropped.

So I learnt nothing. My confidence was in the negatives. And, I was becoming… angry.

Champaign in a mug. Make the most of what you have, because the hand you are dealt doesn’t change.